( her gaze falls here and there's something similar to shame at what she feels, not for her actions over the years but really for how long it had taken for her to really accept that lucifer had never meant for her to ascend )
I still serve him.
( the words are quieter still before her head rises again, giving more to her answer )
I did until this place. ( it had begun to put things into more context for her, particularly with the knowledge that nick had delivered to her ) He had been all I'd ever known and-- I wanted what he promised.
( she still did but at least now lilith knows that she'll get it if just in a different manner than expected. perhaps in a way more satisfying. but she'd been taken in by him. lucifer had been kind and it had taken him transforming into the beast for that to begin to crack, for his darkness to be truly revealed. but she was lost by then -- in love, a promise in her future and her own destiny in mind. restore his angelic form and restore her lucifer to her.
some of that had fallen away over the years but she'd still been stuck. there had been no escape for her, she didn't need to try to know what would happen to her. the crown and throne may have kept her there but they were also more desirable, a light in the darkness that her life had been. and when she did well-- well, it made it easier to ignored everything else )
no subject
I still serve him.
( the words are quieter still before her head rises again, giving more to her answer )
I did until this place. ( it had begun to put things into more context for her, particularly with the knowledge that nick had delivered to her ) He had been all I'd ever known and-- I wanted what he promised.
( she still did but at least now lilith knows that she'll get it if just in a different manner than expected. perhaps in a way more satisfying. but she'd been taken in by him. lucifer had been kind and it had taken him transforming into the beast for that to begin to crack, for his darkness to be truly revealed. but she was lost by then -- in love, a promise in her future and her own destiny in mind. restore his angelic form and restore her lucifer to her.
some of that had fallen away over the years but she'd still been stuck. there had been no escape for her, she didn't need to try to know what would happen to her. the crown and throne may have kept her there but they were also more desirable, a light in the darkness that her life had been. and when she did well-- well, it made it easier to ignored everything else )